Off to work I went. I arrived at Perspiration Betty's and immediately regretted it. When she asked about the bananas, I said I'd forgotten them (I'd actually eaten them on the way). Perspiration Betty showed me into a room with a phone and a bed, and told me to make myself comfortable. I was so excited, my first proper job, that I even got my photo taken before I started! Perspiration Betty then explained the job to me. I was to be an operator for an adult chat line! I couldn't last the course. My first call came through, and as I started to read from my script that I was "a naughty monkey", I just hung up on the caller. Perspiration Betty was furious. I said that I was a serious monkey with a blue rosette, with genuine political career aspirations, and it would only do me harm within the Conservative Party to continue working there another moment, so I left immediately. I didn't get paid.
Ah well, I'm off to the agencies tomorrow. I went round my mate Johan's place after quitting the job; he's a German football, and he'd TIVOed the football game from earlier. As you probably know, England lost. Look at the smug git grinning! I'm feeling even more down now. Will I ever get a decent job?