Gillian Gibbons - a clarification

Last weekend, in Barmpotsby, Yorkshire, one of my campaign team, Johan, made a comment about the case of the teacher Gillian Gibbons, who was jailed in Sudan for calling a teddy bear Mohammed. Whilst helping me canvassing, he spoke about the case and said to a voter on the doorstep: "It's the first time that anyone's ever called for the early release of a Scouser from prison."

This obviously did not go down well with either the voter, or myself, and overhearing this, I immediately reprimanded Johan. It furthermore did not go down well with the people of Barmpotsby, as the local press, the Barmpot Mercury got word and printed a less than complimentary article.

I would like to disassociate myself completely with Johan's comments, and will be doing so when I meet with the consituency association for an Emergency General Meeting next Tuesday. Johan has since resigned his membership of the party.

Monkey update

My apologies for not blogging recently. I've delivered over twenty thousand leaflets in a week by myself, and am still working hard to fight Barmpotsby. I'll keep you updated.

Have you seen Monkey?

I am Johan. I am writing. Ja. Will Monk, my Friend Monkey with a blue Rosette was from Yorkshire gone; he was back to Ludlow here came, but he did not come. He has sent me a Textmessage. He says he is leaving. But he is never come here. I don't know where he is. Have you seen him? He was worried about being followed by a strange Man with a Vegetable-Shape Head. He followed him to Yorkshire. I will call the North West Riding Constabulary.

UPDATING: I have with the Police spoken in North West Riding of Yorkshire. They will look for him. He is local Celebrity in Barmpotsby now.

Monkey win!

Ah ja, here is Johan. Again can I Will Monk's Blog write. He sends to me a Textmessage, he is selected for Prospective Parliamentary Candidate for Yorkshire seat of Barmpotsby.

He is very happy. He is now there staying and he returns tomorrow. But he is scared. The strange Man with Vegetable Head follows him. My Monkey Friend is worried.

He also sends me Photomessage. He is catching a train to go to Yorkshire.

Read this Blog! I am called Johan, I can for Will write, and I make this Blog well!

Preparation to go to Yorkshire

I'm glad to hear that everything is going well at Tory Party Conference, but things aren't going so well here. I've noticed that there's a very strange man following me around; he looks like a familar vegetable, but I can't put my finger on it.... It's got me worried somewhat. I spotted him under my tree earlier, but he didn't see me. I hope I can shake him off before I head to Barmpotsby in Yorkshire tomorrow!

Another selection meeting coming up

I'm off to Yorkshire next week. I'm not going to conference, as there's a selection meeting for me to attend. I've got my train ticket booked, time off work, and everything, travelling to Manchester, then across via Leeds. The town of Barmpotsby is a good Conservative/Labour marginal. It's got a lot of rural areas in the constituency, so I reckon it's got a good chance to go blue next time. The local Conservative Association is looking for a candidate, and I'm off to hopefully get selected!

Wish me luck!